Java Joke

A group of 4 Microsoft .NET programmers and a group of 4 Java programmers are going on a train to an expo. The MS programmers buy a ticket each, and then watch the Java programmers proceed to buy one ticket between them.

The MS programmers are intrigued and when they get on the train, they watch the Java programmers to see what they do when the guard comes to check the tickets. It turns out that, before the guard comes, they all cram into the toilet. The guard knocks on the door, and asks for the ticket. The guard takes it from under the door, and slides it back.

The MS programmers are all impressed, so on the way back, they buy only one ticket. Only to watch the Java folks get on the train without buying a ticket at all.

When they get on the train, the MS people cram into the toilet, as they saw the Java folks on the earlier journey. The Java programmers then knock on the door, and say “Ticket please”. The MS programmers slide the ticket under the door, as they saw the Java programmers do earlier.

“Thank you”, they say. “You steal our methods, but you don’t understand them.”

Which Type Of Woman Is Your Girlfriend?

HARD-DISK WOMAN: She remembers everything, FOREVER.
RAM WOMAN: She forgets about you the moment you turn her off.
WINDOWS WOMAN: Everyone knows that she can’t do a thing right, but no one can live without her.
EXCEL WOMAN: They say she can do a lot of things but you mostly use her for
your four basic needs.
SCREENSAVER WOMAN: She is good for nothing but at least she is fun!
INTERNET WOMAN: Difficult to access. Everybody will access!!
SERVER WOMAN: Always busy when you need her.
MULTIMEDIA WOMAN: She makes horrible things look beautiful.
CD-ROM WOMAN: She is always faster and faster.
E-MAIL WOMAN: Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.
VIRUS WOMAN: Also known as “wife”; when you are not expecting her, she comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if you don’t try to uninstall her you will lose everything
SHAREWARE WOMAN: free to install but everytime you want to use it you get nagged for money.
TROJAN HORSE WOMAN: Lets you in the back door.

My Favorite is:

JAVA WOMAN: write once run anywhere i.e platform independent.